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shit, shitty, shit Mood: depressed, disconnected... I'm feeling rather down and out today. Work was quite sucky. I kept screwing things up & no matter how hard I tried no one seemed to be satisfied. I wanted to find a dark corner, curl up, & cry. I'm starting to feel like every hates me. I'm not good enough for anybody anymore & not that I've ever been good enough, but...I don't even do a sufficient job at work anymore, I've fallen behind on house work & all I can do is yell. And yelling only makes me feel better while I'm doing it. Afterwards I feel like I'm floating outside my body. I feel so under appreciated especially for everything that I do for people. It goes unnoticed & all people do is take advantage of my weaknesses. I give and I give and I give -- And all you (<--- general you) can do it take, take, take! Justin and I have been arguing a lot lately. I know it's due to my shitty moods. All I want to do is sleep and cry and a eat shit loads of carbs. On a slightly good note...I've lost another pound on my diet. So, that's now 16lbs that I've lost. I just need to fucking stop cheating...I swear -- If I'd have actually followed my diet then I'd probably be down like between 20 & 25 pounds. But no...I'm weak and I like to eat. So fuck. *sigh* I'm feeling especially fat today. Not that I'm not normally fat, but I'm just feeling extremely huge. I mean, I am morbidly obese, but...today it's more like 1000 times worse than that. Well, I have nothing else to say. Until next time... |
 <3--<3--<3--<3--<3--<3  Name: Emily <3--<3--<3--<3--<3--<3 Navigation: <3--<3--<3--<3--<3--<3 Other Journals: <3--<3--<3--<3--<3--<3 Local Links: |